A big, amazing, out of this world great job offer today. I am not making this up. I had been hoping for one. The reason I started this program was that I was seeking more gainful employment and I wanted to feel comfortable with the energy of A LOT more money.
And it was fantastic, thrilling, and indescribably exciting to hear that I could make enough money to pay my bills. To get a roof before monsoon. To have luxuries without feeling I'm spending money on them that I should be spending on something else.
But the most interesting, most useful thing that this job offer offered ... was how much it made me aware of how I had been thinking of things from the scarcity standpoint.
Suddenly I noticed how often, how much, and for how long I have been telling myself all kinds of things that would fly in the face of having that much money.
Obvious things like, "we can't afford that," but much more subtle things like, "I'm not good enough because we can't afford that."
But with that new thought that I could move into a whole new financial bracket — easily, effortlessly — I became acutely sensitive to both the change in my vibration (from being giddy over this new circumstance) and how incredibly powerful and ingrained my way of thinking of myself as not wealthy had become.
"Argue for your limitations ..." my friend Kitty quoted Richard Bach's saying this morning ... and in this moment of feeling like I really could have plenty of money, I could feel most of the weight of this struggle was just all the dross I was telling myself about not having money.
It's hard to do the realization justice. I'm not, technically, in a better financial situation yet. I still bought groceries with the credit card on Sunday.
But with the joy and relief of thinking I could have a job that would more than pay our bills, I was able to shift my entire view of myself and my life. I could see how much more the poorness, the struggle, was related to the scandalous onslaught of what I'd been telling myself than to my actual financial situation.
I feel like I get something now — I have hard evidence of something — that the Feel It Real programs purport, but that never made this much visceral sense to me before.
Admirers of the Law of Attraction may explain that you have to choose your vibe such that it pleases you. And that it is better to feel wealthy than even to necessarily be wealthy. And you may still feel like, "yeah, yeah, but where's my cheese?"
But when you experience the incredible relief that feeling wealthy brings to your vibe, when you get the relief of not telling yourself the things that were all bound up with your perception of yourself as not having enough, then you realize what an incredible burden telling yourself those things was.
Much more of a burden than any actual lack of money.
I am basking in the relief right now of not seeing myself as not wealthy enough or more specifically, lacking. This is life-changing. More tomorrow as I savor being a Vibrational Millionaire because all the things I told myself that were making me miserable about my own financial prowess ... I get to stop telling myself.
I gotta tell you, this relief feels pretty rich to me.